My whole life growing up, I would watch sports games and listen to the commentators talk about, how this player x had a huge chip on his shoulder coming out of college. I would always wonder why, then they would go on to describe what the athlete went through, or how far he dropped in the draft. The biggest mistake was thinking that this would somehow make me better by having a chip on my shoulder.
I then researched the term, and looked up the athletes, who claimed that they had a massive chip on their shoulder. What I discovered next was laughable. These athletes let someone else's opinion, affect their whole personality and character. This chip on their shoulder did nothing but give the other person power over them.
When you have a chip on your shoulder, it doesn't make you tough, or edgy. It makes you an insecure punk, who cares way too much what other people think about them. I even remember a lot of the quotes. "I'm gonna show them, I should have been drafted in the first round."
"I'll show them they never should have traded me."
When you think this way, you are living your life for other people. That's the first mistake of having a chip on your shoulder. You're living your life for other people, and you're making yourself weaker and more insecure by the day. This is what people fail to realize.
The I'll show you mindset
People that embody and carry out this mindset are deeply insecure. They are so desperate for approval and recognition that they'll go through anything to prove it to you. The problem with this is the payoff. What do you get out of showing someone else? They don't care!! Most of the time, they say things like you can't do it to tease you. They don't care if you actually do.
I remember one time, I told a guy he couldn't squat 225, when he actually did, he asked me if I saw it. Obviously I didn't see it, you see I didn't care about the other guys workout at all. In fact, his workout meant nothing to me. When he offered to show me his 225 squat, I told him that I wasn't interested and didn't care.
He spent his whole workout thinking about me telling him he couldn't squat 225. He was demoralized when I told him I didn't care. He squatted 225 just to prove it to me. Why not prove it to himself?
He was more concerned with my comment, than his own workout.
That says a lot about his lack of drive and character. He was more driven to prove me wrong, than he was to make progress. That's the issue with trying to prove people wrong. What if they don't care?
There lies the problem, he busted his ass to squat 225 all for someone, in this case me, who doesn't care about him at all. When you focus on what you're doing, that's when you'll make the most gains. Focusing on other people, will keep you weak mentally, and physically. You can only be the best you.
It doesn't matter if someone thinks you can't do something, all that matters is what you think. Stay focused on what you want to do and do it. Don't let any distracting thoughts get in the way.
When you carry a chip on your shoulder, your purpose is to prove people wrong, that means you are living for other people instead of living for yourself. If you wish to live that way fine, what I'll never understand is why people think it is helping them. Learn to live for yourself, I'll admit that I've been called names I didn't agree with, cocky, egotistical, self-serving, prima donna, especially when I was an athlete growing up.
Now, I never went out of my way to prove those people wrong. I allowed them to have their own opinion. If you're an American, you understand that we have free speech and so do other people. They have a right to think you suck, and you have a right to not care what they have to say.
IDGAF
Honestly, if you want to be a success you need to learn to let go of other people. That means, that you need to stop caring about what they're doing and about what your opinion of them is. Stay 100% focused on yourself. If your girlfriend dumps you, get a new one. If you hate your training partner get a new one. Yes, this is definitely common sense, which unfortunately isn't so common anymore.
It's simple advice, yet most people would rather wallow in self-pity, or show their girlfriend or boyfriend that they made a mistake. My question, is why do you want them to admit that? It's because you still care about them. The new approach is to train yourself not to care. I've been dumped before, I accepted reality, I never tried to show my ex, or any other woman that they made a big mistake.
I just moved on, I focused forward. I put my attention on the present day and how I can live it to the best of my ability. Focus on today, that's all you can do. Sure you can daydream about the future, yet, that doesn't mean you can forget about today. A lot of people struggle with this. Stop caring, who cares about tomorrow. Don't check what your ex or current girlfriend or significant other is doing on social media, live your life.
The key to not caring is to just live your life. Again, it sounds overly simplistic, sometimes that's what you and I need. Keep your life simple. If you want to build muscle mass, focus on big barbell lifts, eat 2 grams per pound of bodyweight in protein and stay in a calorie surplus. Nothing revolutionary. You don't have to reinvent the wheel to be a success.
Thank you for reading.
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